What Do You Really Want?
Well, the end of summer is here. My four months of (somewhat) carefree living are done, spiraling me into a near panic attack state, which happens every near-September. Printing out my school schedule, calling my academic advisor, and realizing *just* how much money I owe the Federal government in student loans. (How was such a big number so easy to ignore?) It makes me sad that I only have ten more days where grades, homework, assignments, and class participation points are not taking up a good chunk of real estate in my life.
In classic girl fashion, I was freaking out about school and life yesterday via twitter (if you don’t follow me.. well, ya should). And it brought a lot of comments, both positive and negative. They ranged from “you can do it!” to “you’re stretching yourself too thin” to “you need to give up the photography and focus on finishing school”.
After a lot of talking it through.. reading online.. praying for guidance.. anything.. and a couple panic attacks thinking about ten years of $500 monthly payments.. I realized that, while everyone’s advice is great, I have to just do what’s right for me. I have to do what I really want.
If what I really want is to be creating art and photographing, then that’s what I’m going to do. I’m not going to give up on my photography business, my life as an artist, or my relationships with the people I love to throw myself into trying to complete my degree in the fastest way possible. I am also not going to sacrifice my marriage for a piece of paper, no matter how much weight it may carry.
If what I really want is to be skilled in fine art and creating beautiful photographs, then that is what I’m going to go to school to do. I have to take my time, and the student loans scare me, but I’m going to continue with my photography and my business – because it’s what I love, and what I really want. So, people can judge me all they want and what I do, but it really is all in pursuit of what I really want.
I hope that you, too, can pause – take a look at your life – and ask yourself, what do I really want?
I leave you with a shot from yesterday at the Irvine Spectrum, taken with my iPhone4.. because sometimes, “The best camera is the one you have with you”.
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4 Responses to “What Do You Really Want?”Speak Your Mind
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HI Katie! Great post about setting goals and truly discovering what you want in life. I am proud of you for trying to do it all, and for settling for nothing less than perfection. I have been in your shoes with a full time job, going to school almost full time, and starting my business, plus being married and running a household. God only gives us what we can handle. Love the image above!
Rock on! I have actually been re-evaluating what is *really* important *for me* in life. For some, it’s financial success, for others it’s an advanced degree, for others it’s perfecting their craft. Spend your time and energy on the things that truly matter to you, and the rest will somehow fall into place
I’m glad you’re still making your art – you are great at what you do and I, for one, believe it’s just a matter of time until you’re a Really Big Deal
How did you get to be so wise at such a young age? You are right on target here, and I am so glad you know that the best thing you can do for yourself is what truly makes you happy. You can live to be 100 and life is still short! Do what you love and love what you do!!
Oh- and btw- that picture is awesome!